I don't want to be just a "humanitarian."
I don't want to be a saint.
I don't want to be a crazy martyr.
I want to have a heart that pleases Christ. I want to have a heart FOR Christ.
And I want to see other people with that same life that somehow God found in His beautiful grace to give me. The only real life I've ever known.
I don't want to be Martha. I don't want to get so caught up in doing the work that I miss what, why, for whom, I'm doing the work.
I don't want to look around in frustration because I think someone's doing something "for the wrong reason." Because I think someone "doesn't get it." Because I think that I know someone's motivation, and that I can judge their actions.
How in the world could I ever know someone else's heart?
I want to be new and I want to do what is right and I want for people to see Jesus. That's all. I don't know what else to say. I don't know how such a simple message can become so so so distorted.
And I don't know what else to do.
I don't want to be Martha. I don't want to play a part in doing the work and losing sight.
I didn't think I had, but I don't want people to look at my life and think that I have, either.
. . . oh Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.
1 comment:
I think the distinguishing mark of the saints and martyrs is just what you said, that they lived for Christ, not for attaining to martyrdom or sainthood. So long as you don't preclude those possibilities, I agree one hundred percent.
And I think that you show people the importance of Christ's love and call more than you know. I know already in the last few weeks I have realized more my need to follow Christ and His love for me, and I think quite a bit of that began with some of our conversations. Just thought I'd let you know that you do show what you want to, to me at least.
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